She sang, she sang so beautiful. I can still imagine her voice in my ears. Sweet like honey pouring out of her mouth. I watched her lips and throat as the bump moved up and down. She had cracked lips and poor skin but she was still beautiful. Her eyes were so dark, like dark matter made its home within her skull. They looked like black holes but they were not empty, in fact they were the opposite. She held the universe in her eyes. I remember she would squint so much; the sun seemed like her eye’s enemy. Her eyes would become knives, pointy and thin as a sheet of ice. You could still see the glint, the star in her eyes. She would smile the smiles of dreams, to touch those velvet lips. Her tears tasted like beautiful ocean rain. She would smile and cry as she moved against me. Her sleek silk skin that I could never hold onto. The tears washed me of my sins, small crucifixions of the heart. I held her hand in mine, so fragile and soft. A porcelain doll that sings and smiles. Sometimes I’m afraid I will break her some day, the cracks slowly growing under a concerned eye. I never noticed them until they were digging deep. She still smiled and sang the most beautiful songs of nectar. Her eyes held the world in a tiny light, among the darkness. Skin the color of crème, hair the blue black shiver of a raven’s wing. Sometimes I couldn’t pull my eyes away from her, the figure of her body burned into the back of my mind. Like music she was, graceful and quiet, a muse of the highest order. If I had the talent I would draw her. I would draw her in every pose and in every style, every size and every template. Only the heavens have the pigments I would need to create such a work of art. If only I could remember, if only I had taken pictures. She is locked in my head; I am the only one that keeps her alive. The doll has shattered but the memory remains. If only you could see the universe in her eyes. My sins remain burned on my dry flesh, cracks and holes of a desert screaming for the rain. The sun never relents but I still remember the rain, I remember the doll that sang in my ear.